Apocalypse Now
Phillip and the Dirty Dozen are in heavy mortal combat. They’re in a dark, hazy room they decide they can use for a base of operations. OMG! Phillip’s been hit! It’s only his arm, “I’ll be all right. I have to be.”
Shawn lights a candle. Belle comes in and asks what he is doing. He has picked up some of her favorite things at d’Amores, “Now all we need is music.”
“No,” says Belle, “We can’t do this. I’m not going to be unfaithful to my husband.” Shawn rolls his eyes.
John shivers like a jackhammer, “If I can just get through this night.” Kate encourages him. If he can do it, the worst will be over. He huffs, “Thanks for staying with me Kate.” Kate tells him she is not going anywhere. They share a tender glance.
The observant Billie tells Bo she doesn’t think Hope will be happy with her interrupting their romantic dinner. “Aw, shucks,” says the ever clueless Bo, “It’s not like today was our anniv...” GGOOLLLLEEEE, “Would today have been our anniversary?” Billie says she wondered if he would remember.
Hope chokes in the background, “Gee I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“Oh, no,” says Billie, “We were just...”
“Reminiscing,” says Hope, as she hands Billie her makeup bag. Billie thanks her and says she has to be going.
Bo tells her, “You’re not going anywhere.” Aw, Gomer, why don’t you just pack up your things and move out to the doghouse permanently? Hope and Billie stare.
Stan the Man reads the letter. He flashes back to the procedure. The phone rings. Tony congratulates him on the completion of the transformation. He asks Stan if he read the letter. Stan says, “Yes, what the hell...”
Tony says, “No questions, just go and do it. Stan isn’t going anywhere until Tony tells him who he is and what this is all about. “That isn’t necessary,” says Tony, “You have everything you need in the letter. Just follow the instructions precisely.”
Stan tells him, “I thought I was bad, but whoever you are, you’re pure evil.”
Tony bursts with pride, “This is your chance. Enjoy.” Stan says there is no way he can do this. Tony purses his lips.
Bo says Billie can’t go because she has no place to stay. They run through the, oh so convenient, litany of places Billie can’t stay for one reason or another. Billie says she will just find someplace. Bo brings up the little matter that Billie would be in violation of the court agreement if she left. Hope repeats over and over, “I can’t believe this.”
Ho and Dope go into the kitchen to argue as Billie listens through the door.
Kate and John caress. John tells Kate he asked her to stay, but, “I wasn’t trying to send you any message.” Kate understands. John tells her, “Brady thinks I need to move on – with you.”
Kate says Billie is giving her similar advice and, “Because my son is married to your daughter and they make a perfect couple, I guess they think we would, too.” Kate assures him she is there for him and is not going anywhere.
Shawn tells Belle, “It’s just dinner.” It’s the dessert Belle is worried about. She doesn’t want anyone to know they are back together until she talks to Phillip. She is worried about Sami since Sami barged in on them, “Now that her wedding got canceled she’s going to want someone to pay, and I think this time it will be worse than ever.”
Stan the Man tells Tony he can’t do this. He breaks down like a little girl. Oh, waitaminute, he is a girl, “I was tempted. But I just lost my job, my son and my fiancée, so I wasn’t (sob) thinking straight when I said I would do this. It’s sick. You’re sick. I can’t do it.”
Tony tries to convince him as Stan the Man bawls into the phone. Tony asks, “Don’t you think your enemies should get what they deserve, beginning with John Black?”
“John,” whimpers Stan the Man. Tony tells him to look in the makeup kit. Stami opens the kit and pulls out a baggie, “Pills,” he asks.
“Yes,” says Tony, “Let the payback begin.”
Belle says Sami will be out of control. She’ll be out to hurt everyone. Shawn tells her she is overreacting. Shawn gives up, “At least I don’t have to go back home to Jan, she’s out of my life.” He flashes back to Jan’s love-den. Belle asks if he is OK. He says he just flashed back again. No problem. This is Salem. Everybody flashes back all the time. He wishes he could remember buying Jan’s engagement ring, “I see you are still wearing Phillip’s ring.”
Belle flashes the 20 karat job on her finger, “Yes, and I’m not taking it off as long as we’re still married. At least I owe him that.”
Phillip’s compadre tries to convince him to go back because of his wound. Phillip won’t do it. It’s just a flesh wound. He’s going to complete the mission. Then he can go to the Pentagon, give his briefing and go see his wife. Jake tells him, “Sorry, buddy, it doesn’t look like that.”
Kate gets a call. Tony, using his Captain Marvel voice disguiser tells her, “This is the bearer of bad news. It seems your son’s lovely wife is spending time with Shawn Brady.” Kate stares.
Belle knows it’s hard for Shawn. Shawn is also worried about Phillip over there. Belle says when he comes home, as hard as it will be, she will tell him. Shawn wonders how he ever got together with Jan and how he ever proposed to her. He gets one of his big headaches. Belle won’t let him leave. She thinks part of the reason he got the headache is he hasn’t eaten all day. She gets one of the take-out packages and starts feeding him. OK. You’ll never guess what happens next. She spills the food all over him. So he has to undress. He asks if she is sure. “We’re adults here, I think we can handle it.” Shawn undresses. Belle STARES.
Kate insists Belle would never cheat on her son. Tony tells her to go find out, “But you’d better do it now, while you have a chance to stop it.” He hangs up and turns to Bart, “So it begins, Phase II”
Kate says to herself, “This can’t be true. Belle wouldn’t do it. But when it comes to Shawn... I have to find out. Tonight. Before it’s too late. I have to do this for Phillip. I have to.” As Kate tries to decide, a stealthy gloved intruder creeps through the house.
Kate leaves. Our intruder, Stan the Man himself, goes into John’s room. John calls for Kate. He sees Stan, “Who’s there?”
“The answer to your prayers,” says Stami.
Ho and Dope argue. Billie listens. Bo says, “We don’t want her to go to jail.”
“Wanna bet,” snaps Hope, “Oh, I forgot, it’s your anniversary.”
Billie storms into the kitchen, “Hope, you’re making a big mistake. If I were you, I’d back off.” Hope’s eyebrows go into sub-orbital flight.
Bart is speechless. Tony’s plan is incredible; “You are now the evil genius to end all evil geniuses – getting Sami Brady to do your dirty work. Even if she gets caught, she takes the rap, not you.” Tony says the best part is Sami’s alter ego Stan could wipe out half of Salem before they know what hit them.
Stan the Man holds up the bag of pills. “So,” says John, “You’re a drug pusher.”
“And you’re a drug user. I’d say that works out perfectly.” John asks him where Kate is. “Kate bailed on you. It’s just you and me and our little friends. Take the drugs. I know you want ‘em.”
John attacks Stan the Man, “GET OUTTA HERE!”
Apocalypse Now. As the bullets fly, Jake tells Phillip the wound is deeper than he thought. It will need stitches. Phillip refuses to turn back. Unfortunately, he does not refuse to flash back. Oh, wait, it’s a flash forward. He imagines he is home and in bed with Belle. She notices his arm. He could have been killed, “Hold me Phillip, and don’t ever let me go.”
Back to the mission of death. Phillip stares at Belle’s crumpled picture, “It won’t be long now, sweetheart.”
Shawn stands there in his skivvies as Belle comes in. She gives him Phillip’s robe to wear. There is a knock at the door. Kate comes in, “What the hell is going on here?”
Billie says she won’t stand out there while they argue over her, “I’m the one to blame. I asked for Bo’s help.” Hope wants to know why Billie can’t just go back to Jennifer’s for one night. Billie says that’s what she is going to do. Bo refuses to let her go. He doesn’t want her to go to jail and he is sure Hope would feel the same way if she would just calm down. Hope wants to finish the conversation she was having with her husband.
Billie leaves while Bo attempts to get his foot dislodged from his mouth. Hope strikes below the belt, “Were you thinking of Billie when you bought this dress? Have you noticed I hardly ever wear seafoam-green?” Yeah, upstairs the dress was perfect. I guess it was teal-green in that light.
Billie hears Bo say, “She doesn’t mean anything to me.”
“I don’t mean anything to him. Did you hear that, Billie? Get over it.”
Bo says he isn’t going to push it. He will leave the decision up to Hope, “What’s it gonna be? Does she stay, or does she go?” Hope stares.
Cannons to the left of them,
Cannons to the right of them,
Into the mission of death
Ride the dumbfounded.
Jake hears Phillip’s plan, “This is suicide.”
Belle tries to ‘splain things to Kate. Kate goes berserk. She doesn’t think Phillip would be too happy about that. She accuses Shawn of taking advantage of Belle. Belle tries to defend him. Kate asks, “Have you forgotten he crashed his motorcycle through the stained glass window at your wedding in a drug-induced rage? Maybe he’s on drugs right now because that would be the only reason he could stoop so low.”
John chokes Stan the Man. Stami, of course, overpowers John, “I come into your house to help you, and this is how you thank me?” Stan digs his heel into John’s back. John screams in pain. “OK,” says Stan the Man, “I’ll go, but I’ll leave the drugs here for you. Sooner or later you will want them. And there’s plenty more where that came from.” John asks why he is doing this. “Why else,” says Stami, “For the money.” He takes John’s watch, “And this, should just about cover it.” Stan leaves. John trembles and stares at the drugs.
Belle insists Shawn does not take drugs. Kate says they were found in his system after his motorcycle stunt-driving exhibition, “How could you do this to your husband who is out risking his life right now?” Belle says she made a mistake. There are things Kate doesn’t know. Shawn doesn’t remember how he wound up with Jan. Belle thinks Jan manipulated Shawn so she could be with him and Belle would marry Phillip.
Belle says, “I love Phillip, but I’m not in love with him.” Kate can’t believe she’s hearing this. Belle says she and Shawn realize this was a terrible mistake, but they’re not going to be together as a couple until Belle can talk to Phillip. Kate is amazed they would call Phillip and tell him this while he is over there fighting, “He will end up dead all because of you.”
Jake tells Phillip if they go through the square they would be sitting ducks. “That’s why I have to go alone,” quacks Phillip.”
Hope relents. She doesn’t want Billie to go to Jail. Bo says, “So she can stay, and we can get back to our romantic evening...”
Bo takes one in the chest. “In your dreams, buddy,” says Hope.
John contemplates the stash. His hand creeps out toward the bag.
Stan the Man gets home, “John, you deserve everything you’re going to get and then some.” Sami thinks, “This is gonna be so much fun. He didn’t even know it was me. I am gonna have my REVENGE.”
Tony twirls his cigar in front of the fire, “Well, Sami’s out for REVENGE and I’m out for blood. Together we’ll be Salem’s worst nightmare.” Puff. Smile.
Previews
========
“KATE,” yells John, “I need you, Kate. Help me.”
“I’m sorry,” says Hope, “I can’t do this. Not with your ex-wife in the next room.”
Shawn tells Belle, “I don’t care what Kate says. We all have to move on with the Days Of Our Lives, and that includes Phillip. Otherwise we’ll all end up miserable.”
Phillip moves into battle. SOLDIER DOWN! SOLDIER DOWN!
Shawn lights a candle. Belle comes in and asks what he is doing. He has picked up some of her favorite things at d’Amores, “Now all we need is music.”
“No,” says Belle, “We can’t do this. I’m not going to be unfaithful to my husband.” Shawn rolls his eyes.
John shivers like a jackhammer, “If I can just get through this night.” Kate encourages him. If he can do it, the worst will be over. He huffs, “Thanks for staying with me Kate.” Kate tells him she is not going anywhere. They share a tender glance.
The observant Billie tells Bo she doesn’t think Hope will be happy with her interrupting their romantic dinner. “Aw, shucks,” says the ever clueless Bo, “It’s not like today was our anniv...” GGOOLLLLEEEE, “Would today have been our anniversary?” Billie says she wondered if he would remember.
Hope chokes in the background, “Gee I hope I’m not interrupting anything.”
“Oh, no,” says Billie, “We were just...”
“Reminiscing,” says Hope, as she hands Billie her makeup bag. Billie thanks her and says she has to be going.
Bo tells her, “You’re not going anywhere.” Aw, Gomer, why don’t you just pack up your things and move out to the doghouse permanently? Hope and Billie stare.
Stan the Man reads the letter. He flashes back to the procedure. The phone rings. Tony congratulates him on the completion of the transformation. He asks Stan if he read the letter. Stan says, “Yes, what the hell...”
Tony says, “No questions, just go and do it. Stan isn’t going anywhere until Tony tells him who he is and what this is all about. “That isn’t necessary,” says Tony, “You have everything you need in the letter. Just follow the instructions precisely.”
Stan tells him, “I thought I was bad, but whoever you are, you’re pure evil.”
Tony bursts with pride, “This is your chance. Enjoy.” Stan says there is no way he can do this. Tony purses his lips.
Bo says Billie can’t go because she has no place to stay. They run through the, oh so convenient, litany of places Billie can’t stay for one reason or another. Billie says she will just find someplace. Bo brings up the little matter that Billie would be in violation of the court agreement if she left. Hope repeats over and over, “I can’t believe this.”
Ho and Dope go into the kitchen to argue as Billie listens through the door.
Kate and John caress. John tells Kate he asked her to stay, but, “I wasn’t trying to send you any message.” Kate understands. John tells her, “Brady thinks I need to move on – with you.”
Kate says Billie is giving her similar advice and, “Because my son is married to your daughter and they make a perfect couple, I guess they think we would, too.” Kate assures him she is there for him and is not going anywhere.
Shawn tells Belle, “It’s just dinner.” It’s the dessert Belle is worried about. She doesn’t want anyone to know they are back together until she talks to Phillip. She is worried about Sami since Sami barged in on them, “Now that her wedding got canceled she’s going to want someone to pay, and I think this time it will be worse than ever.”
Stan the Man tells Tony he can’t do this. He breaks down like a little girl. Oh, waitaminute, he is a girl, “I was tempted. But I just lost my job, my son and my fiancée, so I wasn’t (sob) thinking straight when I said I would do this. It’s sick. You’re sick. I can’t do it.”
Tony tries to convince him as Stan the Man bawls into the phone. Tony asks, “Don’t you think your enemies should get what they deserve, beginning with John Black?”
“John,” whimpers Stan the Man. Tony tells him to look in the makeup kit. Stami opens the kit and pulls out a baggie, “Pills,” he asks.
“Yes,” says Tony, “Let the payback begin.”
Belle says Sami will be out of control. She’ll be out to hurt everyone. Shawn tells her she is overreacting. Shawn gives up, “At least I don’t have to go back home to Jan, she’s out of my life.” He flashes back to Jan’s love-den. Belle asks if he is OK. He says he just flashed back again. No problem. This is Salem. Everybody flashes back all the time. He wishes he could remember buying Jan’s engagement ring, “I see you are still wearing Phillip’s ring.”
Belle flashes the 20 karat job on her finger, “Yes, and I’m not taking it off as long as we’re still married. At least I owe him that.”
Phillip’s compadre tries to convince him to go back because of his wound. Phillip won’t do it. It’s just a flesh wound. He’s going to complete the mission. Then he can go to the Pentagon, give his briefing and go see his wife. Jake tells him, “Sorry, buddy, it doesn’t look like that.”
Kate gets a call. Tony, using his Captain Marvel voice disguiser tells her, “This is the bearer of bad news. It seems your son’s lovely wife is spending time with Shawn Brady.” Kate stares.
Belle knows it’s hard for Shawn. Shawn is also worried about Phillip over there. Belle says when he comes home, as hard as it will be, she will tell him. Shawn wonders how he ever got together with Jan and how he ever proposed to her. He gets one of his big headaches. Belle won’t let him leave. She thinks part of the reason he got the headache is he hasn’t eaten all day. She gets one of the take-out packages and starts feeding him. OK. You’ll never guess what happens next. She spills the food all over him. So he has to undress. He asks if she is sure. “We’re adults here, I think we can handle it.” Shawn undresses. Belle STARES.
Kate insists Belle would never cheat on her son. Tony tells her to go find out, “But you’d better do it now, while you have a chance to stop it.” He hangs up and turns to Bart, “So it begins, Phase II”
Kate says to herself, “This can’t be true. Belle wouldn’t do it. But when it comes to Shawn... I have to find out. Tonight. Before it’s too late. I have to do this for Phillip. I have to.” As Kate tries to decide, a stealthy gloved intruder creeps through the house.
Kate leaves. Our intruder, Stan the Man himself, goes into John’s room. John calls for Kate. He sees Stan, “Who’s there?”
“The answer to your prayers,” says Stami.
Ho and Dope argue. Billie listens. Bo says, “We don’t want her to go to jail.”
“Wanna bet,” snaps Hope, “Oh, I forgot, it’s your anniversary.”
Billie storms into the kitchen, “Hope, you’re making a big mistake. If I were you, I’d back off.” Hope’s eyebrows go into sub-orbital flight.
Bart is speechless. Tony’s plan is incredible; “You are now the evil genius to end all evil geniuses – getting Sami Brady to do your dirty work. Even if she gets caught, she takes the rap, not you.” Tony says the best part is Sami’s alter ego Stan could wipe out half of Salem before they know what hit them.
Stan the Man holds up the bag of pills. “So,” says John, “You’re a drug pusher.”
“And you’re a drug user. I’d say that works out perfectly.” John asks him where Kate is. “Kate bailed on you. It’s just you and me and our little friends. Take the drugs. I know you want ‘em.”
John attacks Stan the Man, “GET OUTTA HERE!”
Apocalypse Now. As the bullets fly, Jake tells Phillip the wound is deeper than he thought. It will need stitches. Phillip refuses to turn back. Unfortunately, he does not refuse to flash back. Oh, wait, it’s a flash forward. He imagines he is home and in bed with Belle. She notices his arm. He could have been killed, “Hold me Phillip, and don’t ever let me go.”
Back to the mission of death. Phillip stares at Belle’s crumpled picture, “It won’t be long now, sweetheart.”
Shawn stands there in his skivvies as Belle comes in. She gives him Phillip’s robe to wear. There is a knock at the door. Kate comes in, “What the hell is going on here?”
Billie says she won’t stand out there while they argue over her, “I’m the one to blame. I asked for Bo’s help.” Hope wants to know why Billie can’t just go back to Jennifer’s for one night. Billie says that’s what she is going to do. Bo refuses to let her go. He doesn’t want her to go to jail and he is sure Hope would feel the same way if she would just calm down. Hope wants to finish the conversation she was having with her husband.
Billie leaves while Bo attempts to get his foot dislodged from his mouth. Hope strikes below the belt, “Were you thinking of Billie when you bought this dress? Have you noticed I hardly ever wear seafoam-green?” Yeah, upstairs the dress was perfect. I guess it was teal-green in that light.
Billie hears Bo say, “She doesn’t mean anything to me.”
“I don’t mean anything to him. Did you hear that, Billie? Get over it.”
Bo says he isn’t going to push it. He will leave the decision up to Hope, “What’s it gonna be? Does she stay, or does she go?” Hope stares.
Cannons to the left of them,
Cannons to the right of them,
Into the mission of death
Ride the dumbfounded.
Jake hears Phillip’s plan, “This is suicide.”
Belle tries to ‘splain things to Kate. Kate goes berserk. She doesn’t think Phillip would be too happy about that. She accuses Shawn of taking advantage of Belle. Belle tries to defend him. Kate asks, “Have you forgotten he crashed his motorcycle through the stained glass window at your wedding in a drug-induced rage? Maybe he’s on drugs right now because that would be the only reason he could stoop so low.”
John chokes Stan the Man. Stami, of course, overpowers John, “I come into your house to help you, and this is how you thank me?” Stan digs his heel into John’s back. John screams in pain. “OK,” says Stan the Man, “I’ll go, but I’ll leave the drugs here for you. Sooner or later you will want them. And there’s plenty more where that came from.” John asks why he is doing this. “Why else,” says Stami, “For the money.” He takes John’s watch, “And this, should just about cover it.” Stan leaves. John trembles and stares at the drugs.
Belle insists Shawn does not take drugs. Kate says they were found in his system after his motorcycle stunt-driving exhibition, “How could you do this to your husband who is out risking his life right now?” Belle says she made a mistake. There are things Kate doesn’t know. Shawn doesn’t remember how he wound up with Jan. Belle thinks Jan manipulated Shawn so she could be with him and Belle would marry Phillip.
Belle says, “I love Phillip, but I’m not in love with him.” Kate can’t believe she’s hearing this. Belle says she and Shawn realize this was a terrible mistake, but they’re not going to be together as a couple until Belle can talk to Phillip. Kate is amazed they would call Phillip and tell him this while he is over there fighting, “He will end up dead all because of you.”
Jake tells Phillip if they go through the square they would be sitting ducks. “That’s why I have to go alone,” quacks Phillip.”
Hope relents. She doesn’t want Billie to go to Jail. Bo says, “So she can stay, and we can get back to our romantic evening...”
Bo takes one in the chest. “In your dreams, buddy,” says Hope.
John contemplates the stash. His hand creeps out toward the bag.
Stan the Man gets home, “John, you deserve everything you’re going to get and then some.” Sami thinks, “This is gonna be so much fun. He didn’t even know it was me. I am gonna have my REVENGE.”
Tony twirls his cigar in front of the fire, “Well, Sami’s out for REVENGE and I’m out for blood. Together we’ll be Salem’s worst nightmare.” Puff. Smile.
Previews
========
“KATE,” yells John, “I need you, Kate. Help me.”
“I’m sorry,” says Hope, “I can’t do this. Not with your ex-wife in the next room.”
Shawn tells Belle, “I don’t care what Kate says. We all have to move on with the Days Of Our Lives, and that includes Phillip. Otherwise we’ll all end up miserable.”
Phillip moves into battle. SOLDIER DOWN! SOLDIER DOWN!
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2 Comments:
LOLOLOL!! "Into the valley of death rode the dumbfounded" that alone made this one a classic. Not to mention sitting ducks and Philip "quacking"!
lol! I love reading these previews, the way they are wrote out and the comments about them get me rolling! great job on writing it. I also thought it was halarious that Sami's new name is now Stami! I also love the sarcasm in Billie's recaps! LOL!
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