I'm Thinking Of Checking Into A Rubber Room

Sami putters around her apartment — and broods. She flashes back to one of her thousands of arguments with Rafe — and broods. A knock snaps her out of her stupor. She looks toward the door, "Rafe?"

Maggie contemplates the bottle. She paces. She contemplates. Pace. Contemplate. She picks up a glass and approaches the satanic brew.

Nathan and Stephanie are chirping outside the pub. Chirping and smooching. Melanie calls Stephanie. Nathan makes a face. Note: You'll have to plan to tune in and watch this episode. I simply can't keep up with all the frenetic action.

Chloe is working at the nurses' station. Daniel walks up and cops a feel. They chirp, too. Chirp and grope. Daniel asks her to go on break. Chloe agrees. She leaves and Carly walks up. "We need to talk now, says Daniel.

Sami swings the door open to find Arianna. She asks if Rafe is there.

"No."

"Do you know when he will be back?"

"Probably never."

Rafe stands in the rumpus room, gets off the phone and rants because there is no news. EJ walks in and Rafe wonders if he has any news. Nope. EJ asks about the argument Rafe had with Sami, "I think I might be able to help."

Arianna says she hasn't seen Rafe since her adventure at the police station. That gets Sami interested. She asks what that's all about but Arianna is evasive. She says Rafe saved her last night. "I wish I could say the same for Sydney," whines Sami.

EJ says, "I understand Samantha better than you do... in this area anyway... I feel Sydney's loss. I know you do to, but not as a parent. I understand where you're coming from. You are using your FBI training. Intellectually, Rafe, that makes sense, but emotionally... it is when the trail runs cold. In my head I think it's unfair I blame you but in my heart you are the reason I don't have my daughter. And Samantha and I will never change our minds about that."

Rafe is stunned, "That's the first time anyone ever used my name and 'intellectually' in the same sentence."

Stephanie hangs up. She says she thinks Melanie deserves to know they are dating, "Are you open to letting her know that?"

CENSORED. Nathan smooches and leaves. Stephanie stares.

Really, guys, if you want just to skim on through, I'll give you a red-alert if anything happens in this episode. I'm out of red ink, but I doubt that will matter.

Carly tells Daniel she shouldn't have lost her cool in public with Vivian at the Java Café. Daniel thinks Melanie will see right through Vivian, but Carly disagrees, "Why did that woman come back to Salem?"

"I don't know," says Daniel, "People usually don't let things like avenging a brutal murder bother them."

Daniel and Carly reminisce about the good times and Daniel's former wife Rebecca. "I will miss her for all the Days Of Our Lives," says Daniel, "but I think she would be happy for me. I'm a lucky man to have a full-figured woman like Chloe in my life."

Carly asks, "When are you getting married? I'll bet you can't wait to have a family... oh, I shouldn't have said something like that. That was pre-mature."

"No," says Daniel, "There was nothing mature about it. We haven't set a date. And hopefully we will have a family eventually."

Rafe says he don' need no stinkin' EJ to tell him how Sami feels. He leaves.

Anna calls EJ, "I was just calling to check on how things are going."

EJ props his feet up and leans back, "Things are going great!"

Sami gives Arianna the third degree, "You were going to prison? Why? Does my dad know?"

Arianna hems and haws, "Can't Rafe tell you."

AHA! Sami sees ammunition to use against him and digs for more, "No — why don't you tell me why he is keeping a secret from me?"

EJ tells Anna the FBI found nothing on the notes. She asks about Sami. EJ chuckles, "She is absolutely miserable."

Rafe arrives at Sami's place. Arianna decides this would be a good time to get outta Dodge. She thanks Rafe for last night and scoots. Sami aims her verbal Howitzer at Rafe, "SO! It turns out your sister is running drugs out of the pub! AND YOU KEPT THAT SECRET FROM ME?"

"I didn't learn about it until recently," says Rafe, "It wasn't my place to tell you since she was undercover."

Little details like that don't bother Sami when she smells wounded prey, "So you get to keep secrets but I don't? If I hadn't told you my secret I would have my daughter back!"

Melanie and Stephanie are inside the pub together. Melanie rambles about all the problems she's having with the wedding. Stephanie says, "You must be going out of your mind."

"I'm thinking of checking into a rubber room," says Melanie, "but I don't want to put off the wedding." Stephanie tells her not to feel awkward about her former relationship with Phillip. Melanie asks how her life is going, "Nathan... anything new with him?"

Stephanie says, "Actually, yes. CENSORED."

Nathan arrives at Maggie's place. He finds the kitchen empty. He also finds the bottle of scotch open and empty. Nathan thinks the unthinkable as Maggie comes in and looks guilty. We wait for the appropriate pregnant pause to pass, "No, Nathan, I didn't drink the bottle of scotch."

"Of course you didn't," says Nathan, "I was stupid for worrying."

"It doesn't take worry to bring out the stupidity in you," says Maggie, "But I had a battle with myself. I had the feeling I should have gone up earlier to check on Mickey. Maybe I could have saved him. Blada-wah-wah. My life is off track and I wonder if I could have changed things and keep blaming myself. Wada-blah-blah."

Stephanie gets a text and says she has to go to work. Melanie asks her to congratulate Nathan for winning the Dr. Tom Horton Golden Bedpan Award.

"I will," stammers Stephanie, "Uh Melanie... good luck with your wedding."

Daniel comes in as Stephanie walks out. He finds Melanie, "How are you doing?"

"After Carly ruined my wedding dress," asks Melanie, "I guess I'm OK. The dress can be fixed but Carly can't. Can you explain why she is such a crazy person?"

"I really can't," says Daniel, "But state-of-the-art medicine shows craziness is hereditary, especially from mother to daughter."

Sydney babbles on the phone. Anna takes the phone back and asks, "Did you get all that."

"Yes," says EJ, "I've been around Samantha enough that I'm completely fluent in babble. I'll be stopping by in a while and I'm bringing you a big box of chocolates."

"Oh, no," says Anna, "Please stop by, but forget the chocolates. I'm on a diet."

The doorbell rings as EJ hangs up. He answers it to find Arianna standing there.

Sami wonders if they will ever get Sydney back, "Rafe, I love you, but... I can't do this."

Daniel insists Carly isn't crazy. He lectures the young impetuous brat about manners and reminds her Dr. Manning is a trained physician who saves lives. Lawrence's ghost appears, "Not always."

Melanie stops his rambling, "OK. OK. Don't bite my head off."

The audience chants, "BITE! BITE! BITE!"

Melanie tells him she has had words with Carly before the incident at the Java Café. Daniel gets off the 'Dr. Manning Train' and jumps over to her pending marriage, "I have seen you interacting with a certain someone at the hospital. Are you sure getting married is what you want to do?"

Melanie doth protest too much, "Yes. We're getting married. And who asked you, anyway?" She clams down and stands up to leave, "I know what I'm doing."

"There's a first time for everything," says Daniel.

Chloe stares through the blinds at a kid. She and Carly talk about children. Chloe says she wishes she could give Daniel a beautiful daughter like the one they are watching, "But that might be something I'm not able to do. I don't know if Daniel... Look, don't tell Daniel we had this conversation. I'm going to find a way to make it happen. I have to."

Maggie says she's headed over to thank Mrs. Hopkins for the food she brought over. She tells Nathan she's laid out some of Mickey's things upstairs, "I want you to have them." Hugs and tears. Melanie watches as Nathan tells her to stop blaming herself. Maggie leaves.

Melanie comes in and tells him he's a wonderful person. In this case it doesn't take one to know one.

EJ invites Arianna in. She puts her purse on a table in the foyer as they walk into the rumpus room. We pan in on her purse sitting beside a cell phone. If Zack Greinke telegraphed his pitches like the DOOL writers telegraph the plotlines, his ERA would be in the hundreds. Arianna thanks EJ for saving her life. She also comes clean about her undercover operation. EJ is just delighted, "You cracked the drug cartel!"

"No," says Arianna, "The big guy is still out there. I'm worried about that."

"Yes," agrees EJ, "I would be."

Rafe says he's going to have his second in command take over Sydney's case. Apparently, he's gone from being a disgraced and fired failure to a big cheese overnight.

"I wasn't talking about who was in charge of Sydney's case," cries Sami.

"Neither was I," says Rafe, "I guess I should pack my stuff, then." Sami's lip quivers.

Nathan tells Melanie there is nothing to talk about and goes upstairs. Melanie has a fit and storms out.

Chloe arrives at the pub and finds Daniel. She apologizes for being late. Daniel senses something is troubling her, "You'd let me know if something was wrong right?"

"Yeah," says Chloe, "In fact, I have to tell you something."

Melanie wanders outside and remembers kissing Nathan, She beats herself up, "What are you doing? You're getting married!" She slams her hand into a railing and reels back in pain.

The audience cheers.

Of course it's Dr. Mommy to the rescue. Carly sees her writhing in pain and asks to look at the hand.

Arianna insists she can take care of herself. She thanks EJ for his concern.

Sami is devastated, "You're moving out?" Rafe doesn't answer. He goes into the next room. Sami Sami breaks down. The Salem water shortage is over.

Chloe sees an envelope Daniel has put on the table. He tells her to open it. Chloe looks inside and jumps for joy, "OMG! The Opera! In Chicago! The Dogga Who-a Ate-a My Homework-a! . How did you get these? I tired but they've been sold out for months!"

Daniel beams, "You obviously don't understand how amazing I am..." A lead balloon crashes. Daniel wipes the smile off his face, "That was a joke."

"You coulda fooled me," says Chloe, "It must've been written by a DOOL writer. But you really are amazing."

Daniel still thinks something is bothering her and vows they will handle it, whatever it may be, "Remember, I slay dragons."

"Right," agrees Chloe, "Miracles do happen."

Morose Maggie returns home. She picks up the picture of her and Mickey and broods, "Oh my love... I don't know what I'm gonna do without you."

Stephanie finds Nathan at the hospital. They both say they talked to Melanie, but neither told her about their relationship. "She's bound to find out," says Nathan.

"Maybe not," says Stephanie.

Carly begs Melanie to let her look at her hand. Melanie caves in. Carly examines and Melanie settles down. "Where does it hurt," asks Dr. Manning.

Melanie gives the medical description, "The fourth metatarsal behind the anterior fibula."

"Oooo," says Dr. Mommy, "Smart girl. Nothing is broken, but you have a bone bruise. That'll be $450."

"I don't understand," whines Melanie, "I've never been nice to you but you're kind and compassionate to me. Except for a couple of coffee-flinging incidents about which we will not speak."

"I'm a doctor," says Carly, "I'm supposed to be kind and compassionate, except to the people I murder."

"There is more to it than that," says Melanie, "Tell me why."

Stephanie says she thinks they can keep things a secret until Phillip and Melanie are married, "And then they're going on an extended honeymoon." Nathan leaves.

Carly asks, "Can you keep a secret?"

Sami Brady has never seen an emotion she couldn't embrace. She spirals into the black hole of blubbering. Rafe walks through the room carrying his knapsack.

EJ shows Arianna pictures of Sydney. The butler announces a call from Berlin. EJ hands Arianna the album and leaves. Arianna hears a phone ringing out in the foyer. She goes out, finds it sitting beside her purse and picks it up. For the first time in her life, she answers a phone without saying, "Hello."

"Willpower is out the window, EJ," says Anna, "Bring the chocolates."

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