Mr. GQ

Roman and Arianna are sitting at a table in the pub. Roman reminds her getting caught is not an option. EJ walks in. He comes to their table and we have stares all around.

Rafe is on the phone with someone who thinks he has spotted Nicole but it turns out not to be her. He hangs up and huffs. Sami the old philosopher tells him its OK. Then she turns into Sami the old mad-dog killer and threatens Nicole.

Nicole is in her room packing her stuff. She starts to wheel Sydney out, but bumps into the landlady from hell. The landlady pokes a newspaper in her face. The headline reads, "DiMera Child Kidnapped," and has Nicole and Sydney's picture plastered on it.

The landlady booms, "What's the hurry, Mrs. DiMera?"

Vivian rattles around in her purse and finds her phone. Pseudo-Mommy starts to take a picture of Phillip but he whips it from her, "You are not my mother! You never were and you never will be!"

Melanie is at the Cheatin' Heart on the phone making plans to study... sometime. Brady comes in with flyers for Sydney. Melanie jumps in with her assessment of the situation, "Nicole is a psycho." Brady rolls his eyes. "I'm sorry," says Melanie, "I know you have feelings for her but now you have Arianna."

More eye rolling, "Arianna and I broke up. It's complicated."

Melanie uncomplicates things, "It was Nicole, wasn't it?"

Arianna tells EJ there is nothing new in the way of news about Nicole, and that Gabi feels awful for helping her. EJ says he appreciates her concern. Arianna leaves and EJ sits with Roman, "I have news... about Nicole."

Sami computes. She gets frustrated because solitaire is such a complex program. Rafe suggests getting something to eat. Sami don' wan no stinkin' food. She gets a call from Roman, picks up and whines, "Daddy, what is it?"

Roman says, "I just spoke with EJ. I think we have a lead. Since the Salem Police Department has never had a lead before, I was calling you to find out if you can suggest what I should do next. Come over to the pub and I'll explain." Lucy and Ricky grab their coats and head for the pub.

Nicole insists the landlady has her confused with someone else. The landlady doesn't buy it. "I'm telling the truth," insists Nicole.

The landlady says she doesn't believe a thing Nicole is saying, so Nicole comes clean and tries the "my husband is powerful and controlling" tact. She tries to push her way out.

The landlady blocks Nicole and holds up her phone, "Stop Right there! I have 911 on speed dial!"

"Why on earth would anyone have 911 on speed dial," asks Nicole.

"Because I can never remember the number," says Blondie.

Dr. Horton checks out poor Stephanie's sprained ankle. Stephanie goes gaga as he pokes and prods.

Vivian tells Phillip she's hurt and wonders why he's being so cruel, "We have a bond. I carried you for 9 moths... well actually 12 on the show, but who's counting? "

Phillip thinks all she did was use him and won't let her do it again, "Get out of my life and stay out!"

Brady tells Melanie Nicole is not a monster, "I'm not defending her actions but she's had a tragic life. All she ever wanted was a family. She loves that little girl."

Melanie asks, "And you love her even though she's never caused you anything but pain?"

"I'm not saying I want to be with her," says Brady, "but you can't choose whom you fall in love with."

Melanie rambles on, but stops ranting as Arianna walks in. She joins the duo and Melanie leaves. Brady... Arianna... Stares.

A crazed maniac stumbles into the pub babbling incoherently. She careens from table to table throwing a fit and... oh, waitaminute, it's just Sami being herself. Roman and EJ tell her EJ got a call from Nicole. They say they couldn't trace the call, but Roman is trying to determine the location. If electronics don't work black magic will.

Nicole begs Landlady Marge to back off. Marge plays her. She says she wants money or she will call the cops. Nicole fires back, "OK... call the cops, but bringing the cops down here could be tricky for business when they see the shady things going on. It would be my civic duty to inform them about everything I've seen and heard.

Marge backs down, "Get out of my face."

"Gladly," says Nicole, "And, by the way, I've been bitten by bedbugs until I'm raw, so keep your mouth shut or I'll have to report that to the board of health."

Vivian is sad that Phillip would lash out at her like this. She reminds him Kate married the man who tried to kill him. She wants to be the mother he never had. He wants her to get out and never show her face again. Vivian refuses and claims he needs her more than ever.

Brady tells Arianna they haven't heard from Nicole, but he thinks he can convince her to bring Sydney back. Arianna growls, "What, because of the great love you share?" She stomps out. Brady stares.

Sami and EJ stand together at the counter pouring coffee.

Out in the audience, the Ejamis squeal, "Oooooo! Pouring coffee without killing each other! That's practically foreplay!"

Sami says, "Thanks, EJ, for telling Dad about Nicole's call." EJ says he's decided working with the police is the best way to bring Sydney home. Roman walks up yammering on the phone. Sami kicks the blathering into high gear, "What-is-it-Dad-what-is-it-do-they-know-where-Nicole-is?" Roman regrets forgetting his handkerchief this morning. They make such good gags.

Nicole is in the seedy side of town with Mr. Uglyguy completing the passport deal. He holds the passports back, "The money your mother gave me this morning was only a down payment. I need more."

Nicole pulls the envelope out of her purse and whines, "All I have left is $100." Mr. Uglyguy grabs the money and chucks the passports at her as he goes. "Wait," whimpers Nicole, "I need that for bus tickets. Now what am I gonna do?"

"I have a rich daddy," says Sydney, "why don't you take me back to him. Maybe he can help."

Nicole goes over and sits by a woman who thinks Sydney reminds her of her niece. Nicole insists it's a boy. The woman asks to say hello. Nicole eyes her purse and lets the woman hold Sydney. The woman gushes over Sydney as Nicole grabs the woman's cell phone and throws her own phone in the trash.

Melanie sits with her friend from the hospital at the Cheatin' Heart and tells her she and Nathan are dating. She says she can't talk about it because of the policy at the hospital... So she talks about it. Phillip walks in and the friend points him out. Melanie and Phillip lock eyes.

Nathan examines Stephanie and tells her he doesn't want things to be awkward at the hospital. He brings up Melanie. Stephanie thinks Melanie thinks Stephanie has a thing for Nathan. That right there, is more thinking than has gone on in this show all season.

Roman gets off the phone and announces there is no news, "My men aren't sure they can track the call." Sami blows her adolescent stack. She starts to run out and EJ grabs her and holds on tight. The Ejami section has a mass swooning.

Nicole is alone in the bus station with Sydney. She says she feels guilty she had to steal, but thinks she had a good reason, "We are going to have a great life in Canada. I want to forget everyone in that miserable town... Except for Brady. He's the best person I know... OMG. People must know by now that he paid my bail!" She hauls out the cell phone and punches in Brady's number.

Brady strolls outside. His phone rings. Nicole says, "Brady, it's me."

Melanie's friend prods, "I think Mr. GQ is checking you out."

Melanie protests, "I don't need Mr. GQ because I have the best boyfriend in the world." Now that she's stirred the pot, Melanie's friend leaves. Melanie goes over and asks if Phillip is stalking her. He says he's just there to have a drink. Melanie figures something is bothering him and tells him she cares.

Nathan says from the time he met Stephanie he thought maybe she could be someone he wanted to be with, but he didn't want to get involved in the drama with her and Phillip. He tells her she's all fixed up and good to go.

"What if Melanie was right," asks Stephanie, "What if I do have a thing for you?"

Sami totally erupts. Rafe promises they will bring Sydney home safely. The basket case hugs him.

Nicole says she can't tell Brady where she is. She says she's worried about Brady since he paid her bail, "I care about you."

"If that's true, then come home right now."

Melanie digs into Phillip's problem. He tells her about the surrogate mom caper, "Now Incubator Mom is back and she wants to coddle me. How can I be a success if I started out as a stolen embryo?"

"Most people's resumes don't go back that far," says Melanie, "I had a tough childhood too, so I understand what you're going through."

Disappointing millions of fans, Prevuze declines to provide the 2010 Super Bowl halftime entertainment. An obscure group, "The Who," will perform instead.

Stephanie admits she's interested in Nathan. "So," says Nathan, "I guess that makes me feel a little..."

"...tense?"

"I'd like to finish my own sentence," says Nathan.

Stephanie's nerves kick in, "Ramble-ramble-blah-blah-you-and-me-shouldn't-have-said-anything-blah-blah-yada-yada-ramble." She stops and we have a moment of blessed silence, "So, say something."

Nathan jabs the knife into her heart and twists, "Although you are an amazing person... Smart.. Beautiful... Long-winded... At this point..."

Stephanie just can't shut up, "You think Melanie is the person for you. Well... how about those Chicago Bulls... I'd say they're a couple years away from where they need to be, wouldn't you?"

"You mean light-years, right," asks Nathan.

"Maybe it's better this way," says Stephanie, "No more games. I'll see you." He stops her from leaving.

Sami rambles as Rafe sits with her and rubs her calf. Actually that's not her calf — as in leg — he's rubbing. It's the cow she just had.

Brady insists Nicole come home. Nicole don' wanna. Brady tells her he and Arianna split up because of her. "Oh, drat the bad luck," says Nicole.

Nathan apologizes if he led Stephanie on in any way. Stephanie wishes him luck with Melanie, "And I Hope neither of you gets hurt." Translation, "I'll be there to pick up the pieces." Stephanie zips off. Nathan... stares.

Melanie moves in, takes Phillip's hand and tells him all this isn't his fault.

Arianna gets back to the pub. Rafe descends on her. She tells him she ran into Brady. Rafe asks if Brady said he had talked to Nicole. Arianna says he didn't, "I have to go upstairs and then get my life back on track whatever is left of it."

Roman leaves. EJ joins Sami. He assures her they will get Sydney back, "And when we do I Hope we can put everything between us behind us."

"I'd like that," says Sami.

Once again, the Ejamis grasp at straws, "SQUEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

Brady says he's not blaming Nicole for what happened with Arianna, "I should hate you but I don't. Tell me you'll come home for your sake and for Sydney's sake. I know you can be the woman I fell in love with."

Nicole hangs up, "Oh, Sydney what should I do?"

Sydney hums that old Lynard Skynard classic, "Just Give Me Three Steps."

Stephanie wanders outside the pub and flashes back to her fantasy about Nathan. Man, a flashback to a fantasy. I guess she's just too worked up to conjure up another fantasy. She pops out of it, "It didn't happen and it's not going to."

Nathan walks into the Cheatin' Heart and watches as Melanie and Phillip get closer... closer...

Brady rushes into the pub and tells Roman he just got a call from Nicole, "I may have gotten through to her." Sami huffs. EJ stews.

Nicole tells Sydney soon they should be in Canada, "Am I doing the right thing?"

Sydney figures she has no choice in the matter and hums "O Canada!"

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