The Farmer In The Dell

Lexie and Theo stroll in the woods as Lexie tries to suck up to him and make him like her.

TANTRUM!

Theo throws a tantrum, too. Lexie responds by doing everything they tell you not to do. She grabs. She wheedles. She begs. She scolds. Chelsea comes up and puts the wicked mother in her place, "Stop it, Lexie!" Theo rejects his evil mother and runs into Chelsea's arms.

Nick looks over his selection of pills as Maggie comes in. We establish the fact Mickey and Maggie returned from their Green Restaurant Convention yesterday afternoon and Mickey has already jetted off to New York. Being alone with Maggie at a convention for a week was more than he could stand so he got out as fast as he could after they returned. Maggie wants to talk about Melanie. Melanie stands outside the door and listens.

John arrives at Marlena's place, "I selected the private investigators. They're gonna help us track down whoever killed the mayor and shot at Samantha. Once we find him, no more witness protection program for your daughter. She'll have to go directly to a home for wayward girls for the rest of her pregnancy."

There is a knock at the door. "That's probably the private eye," says John. Marlena opens the door and we see a total stranger standing there. Marlena explodes, "BRADY!"

Kayla hums "Workin' On The Chain Gang " as she goes through her paperwork. The audience would rather BE on the chain gang than listen to that. Max comes up and asks for a minute. He wants to talk about the dreadful way he's treating the family and say he's sorry.

Marlena is shocked Brady didn't tell her he's back in town. Brady says he decided to surprise her. Marlena turns, "John, it's Brady. Your son's home. Just think, if you'd have kept your identity as Roman, he'd be Brady Brady."

Brady Brady adds to the frivolity, "It's great to see you, Dad. How are you doing?" John is gruff and says he wants to get back to business.

Marlena says, "John, your son is home."

"You already said that," says John, "It doesn't change the fact that none of us recognize him."

Theo pitches a fit. Chelsea sings.

The farmer in the dell,
The farmer in the dell,
After a trip to Salem said,
I'd rather go to hell.
Theo settles down. "I read somewhere that autistic children respond to music," says Chelsea, "Heaven only knows why he responded to that garbage. " Lexie thanks her for all she's done for Theo. Chelsea says she loves working with him. Lexie makes another attempt and we get another fit. Theo throws another one, too.

Max says he is sorry he hurt people in the process of looking for Melanie. Kayla offers support, "You had to go find Melanie and bring her home, no matter what the consequences." Translation: The end justifies the means.

"It's time to move on," says Max, "in life and in love."

"You'd better proceed slowly," says Kayla, "You're running out of nieces."

Nick tells Maggie Melanie doesn't have anywhere else to go. Melanie comes in and thanks Maggie for letting her stay. She promises not to be trouble, "Except for an occasional murder or two, but I'll clean up after myself." Nick leaves. Maggie tells Melanie she wants to get a few things straight.

Nick calls a nurse and demands more meds. He gets nasty, "If you can't phone it in for me I'll find someone who will!" He hangs up and walks off. Rush Limbaugh jumps out of the bushes and offers to sell him some oxycontin.

John is distant as Marlena rambles on with Brady about his rehab. Brady says he knew the first place he had to go after treatment was home to make amends. John has had it. He decides he has to go. As he walks out the door, he turns to Brady and drones, "Welcome home."

"Thanks," says Brady. The junkies begin to bond.

Marlena apologizes for John. Brady says he knows the score on John and understands. Marlena gets serious, "I should tell you — your father seems to be ill."

At the hospital, Doctor Whittaker meets Nick. Nick asks for a refill. The doctor says he has to reexamine him first. Nick says the pain is unbearable. The public address system booms, "Calling Dr. Whittaker! Calling Dr. Whittaker! Code red in the supply closet! Stat! "

"I have to go," says Dr. Whitaker, "I have an appointment with nurse Bambi. I'll write you a half-prescription, but that's it." He takes out his pad, scrawls and heads for his rendezvous.

Kayla bumps into Nick and asks if he is OK.

Melanie talks to Maggie about staying there, "Uh, if you're worried that Nick and I are... uh... doing the Bonnie and Mickey here in your house... we're not. We're just friends."

Maggie is stern, "He gave you a ring."

"It's a friendship ring," announces Melanie, "He's my only friend."

"Finally, " says Maggie, "You said something I actually believe. You know, Nick's big heart is to his detriment." She brings up Willow.

Melanie says, "Well Nick didn't tell me about any Willow. What happened to her?"

Maggie gives Melanie her most evil look, "She died — smashed her head on the Jan Spears Memorial Rock."

Chelsea gets Theo to respond. Lexie wants to know why Theo won't respond to her. "I'm not his mom," says Chelsea, "or at least we haven't found out that I am yet. " She offers to take Theo to the playground. Lexie decides to go to the pub. She says goodbye but Theo won't look at her. Chelsea takes him off. Lexie's lip quivers.

Maggie says Willow's death was an accident. She tells Melanie how Nick tried to help her but got burned, "Things didn't work out so he killed her. No big deal." Melanie says she has no intention of hurting him. Maggie gets in her face, "If you do you will answer to me."

"I think I'd rather have Nick kill me," says Melanie.

Nick tells Kayla the pain comes and goes. She looks at the prescription. She tells him to be careful with that stuff and asks if anything else is wrong, "Stephanie told me that she hasn't seen much of you lately — that you really haven't been yourself since Melanie came to town."

"I'm the same old Nick," he chirps, "Everyone else has changed. Especially Brady. "

Marlena tells Brady about John's episodes, "He will not accept more treatment because he's afraid of doctors."

"That makes a lot of sense in this town," says Brady.

Marlena says that's why she filed for divorce, "But I'll never give up on him, though."

Brady asks, "Isn't divorce giving up?"

"Not really," says Marlena, "We'll probably get back together. I really did it so I can be Marlena - Evans - Craig - Bradford - Brady - Black - North - Black - DiMera - Black." Brady wants to help her deal with it.

Melanie sits on a park bench and zones as Max comes up. Max asks, "Are you OK?"

Melanie growls, "Like you care. At least Nick believes in me."

"Believes in you," repeats Max, "He flat out told me he loves you."

Nick returns to Maggie's house. Maggie tells him she warned Melanie not to hurt him. "Ah," says Nick, "You must've told her about the Willocide. By the way, do you think it takes more than two murders to qualify as a serial killer? Just askin'..."

Maggie gets a call and hustles off. Nick pulls out the pills and gobbles a couple. He fumbles around and drops the bottle as Maggie returns. She picks it up and gasps, "Nick, what are you doing with these pills?"

Kayla sits in the pub and talks to little Joe. It's the first adult conversation she's had all day. Lexie joins her and tells her about Theo's meltdown, "Chelsea saved the day."

"You're in worse shape than I thought," says Kayla.

Lexie whines, "I think Theo would rather be with anyone but me."

"Most of us feel that way," says Kayla. Lexie says she sees herself as a terrible mother.

"That's good," says Kayla, "You should always try to look at yourself through your child's eyes."

Melanie is surprised at Max' news bulletin. Max notices the ring. Melanie says it's just a friendship ring. Max wants her to give it back and stop leading Nick on. Melanie whines, "I'm sick of everyone thinking I'm just a scheming bitch."

That's not true," says Max, "Nobody's accusing you of scheming. So tell me, are you in love with him too?"

~*~*~*~*~*~ crickets ~*~*~*~*~*~

"That's what I thought," says Max, "Don't you dare hurt him.

Maggie lectures Nick about the pills, "You were on pills when you were arrested for drunk driving weren't you?"

"No," says Nick, "I was on Maple Street. " Maggie has a conniption. Nick gets defensive and resorts to the mother of all no-no's. HE SASSES AUNT MAGGIE!

Maggie gasps, "You've never spoken to me that way before."

"I guess that proves I'm stoned, " says Nick. In complete fear for his life, Nick backpedals like a palooka in the ring with Muhammad Ali. Maggie says she wants him to promise to take care of himself. Nick promises.

Maggie gives him back the pills and says she has to go to work. She bawls her way out of the room, "We'll talk about this later!"

Once Maggie is gone and Nick can sass in private he says, "No we won't, Aunt Maggie, 'cause Melanie and I are taking a trip."

Of course, Melanie walks in and overhears, "We're taking a trip?" The cheering in the audience goes out of control.

Kayla won't let Lexie beat herself up, "What Theo needs is love."

"That's good advice," says Lexie.

"I know," says Kayla, "It takes years of medical training to come up with something like that. " Conveniently, Kayla has a story she can share about Stephanie that the writers just made up, "Stephanie used to cry and cry all the time and I never could get through to her, but Caroline always could. I resented that but came to realize Caroline was taking the little nuisance off my hands, so I grew to embrace it."

"I didn't know that," says Lexie, "When did all that happen?"

"Last week."

Chelsea and Theo find Max. High fives between the guys. Chelsea ditches the kid so she and Max can bore us to death. Max tells her he just had another run in with Melanie and she is still staying with Nick. Chelsea thinks Melanie will break Nick's heart, "Even more than I did."

Nick suggests a trip to the Green Mountain Lodge. Melanie doesn't think so. He apologizes for pushing, but stomps out.

Melanie drones, "Way to go, Melanie, push away your only friend."

Marlena insists Brady stay with her. John comes back, "My contact is on the case." He gives Brady a look, "So you're still here."

"'Fraid so," says NuBrady, "Get used to it. I'm not going anywhere." John is unmoved as Marlena suggests they spend time together. John says his agenda is full and leaves.

Brady insists he's fine, "I know I'm a stranger to Dad."

"Actually," says Marlena, "That goes for all of us."

Brady says, "There was a part of me that hoped when he saw my face..." Marlena assures him one day John will look in his eyes and see some part of himself.

Kayla drags out the Dr. Phil two bit psychology quotes, "There is no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a great one. Theo is lucky to have you and Abe." Lexie insists she and Abe are the lucky ones. The two share the secret bonding handclasp of sisterhood.

Max says he knows Chelsea didn't mean to break Nick's heart. Chelsea thinks she's pushed him to someone who will hurt him more. Max tells her about the ring. Chelsea says she wishes Nick luck. "He'll need it," says Max.

Nick has left his phone back in Maggie's kitchen. It rings and Melanie picks up. Maggie is on the other end and says she's trying to reach Nick.

"What a coincidence," squeals Melanie, "You called his phone!"

Maggie asks her to have Nick call ASAP, "Please don't forget."

Any normal person would agree, hang up and write a note. However, they have to set up the following predictable scene by actually having Melanie say, "I won't forget. In fact I know it's so important, I will write it down for Nick so he will be sure to get it. Have a nice day."

Melanie hangs up and walks over to the desk in the kitchen. She opens the drawer and takes out the notepaper and contemplates it. She wrinkles her brow, digs into her purse and takes out a wadded up note from the evil creep who has been threatening her. She compares the two, "NICK!"


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