Put Out Or Shut Up

Nick paces. The brat tells him to sit down and assures him it's OK. "If you say so," he drones.

"I'm glad somebody remembered to take their jerk pills this morning," says Chelsea. They both insist they are trying to stay positive while they wait for the coroner's inquest. Nick's phone rings. It's his parents, but he doesn't answer. He talked to them about this last night, and turned from perfect son to screw-up in a single conversation.

Phillip and Belle walk up looking for Shawn. Chelsea gives them a cold reception.

Bo tells Shawn the coroner will be there soon. Shawn frets over not doing enough for Willow's baby if it's his. Bo reminds him he was trying to protect Claire, and he did such a fine job of that, too. Belle and Phillip come in and tell him they have to leave for Chicago immediately. "We got a lead on Claire," says Belle."

Lucas wads up the note, "Dammit, Sami!" He makes a call and asks for the number for Tony DiMera, "I don't care if the number is unlisted. I need that number now. A woman's life is at stake! Because when I find her, I'm going to kill her."

Sami tells EJ it seems like DiMera déjà vu. The last time he brought her to see Stefano it was in a warehouse like this. EJ tells her not to be afraid. Sami hears music, "What's that?"

"Wagner," says EJ, "That's his way of letting us know he's ready to see us." Ride of the Valkyries plays in the background. EJ suggests they go inside.

"The world hates a coward," sighs Sami.

"You're many things," says EJ, "But you're not a coward."

They go inside. The music swells. Sami sees Stefano. "You look like the healthiest dead guy I've ever seen," says Sami.

"Ah, You flatter me, Samantha," laughs Stefano, "What a blessing it is to see you, my son. Come, let me embrace you as I should." EJ and Stefano share a guy-hug as the Valkyries ride on.

Shawn tells them they can't go yet because they are waiting on the coroner's inquest. Belle tells him the dastardly baby pageant ring is holding an event today. They've got to go right now. Magnanimous Phillip steps in, "Shawn, you're in a tough spot. Why don't Belle and I go romp around Chicago and you can meet us there later?"

Nick says she should never have let Willow blackmail him in the first place, "Maybe she would still be alive."

"And I would be in jail," says Chelsea, "Maybe I should feel a lot worse about her being gone, but I don't. You went to that beach for me."

Nick doesn't want her to think she owes him, "If that's why you are doing this then..."

She kisses him, "That is why I am here, OK?"

"That's really nice."

"I give you the most earth shattering kiss ever and all I get is 'that's nice.'"

"No," says Nick, "That's great. I just don't know what's going to happen and if it's bad, I don't want you here." Chelsea tells him they have a history together. It may not be counted in years, but it's a history of being there for each other, even if under assumed names. No matter how today ends, it will end with her being there for him.

Sami tells Stefano John's kidney seems to agree with him. Stefano turns off the music and thanks Elvis for coming.

Stefano checks out Sami, "You are lovelier than I remember." Sami asks if he is talking about her or Colleen. "You must never pay attention to the ramblings of a man flat on his back," says Stefano. Sami gets irritated. She doesn't think she is going to get an honest answer out of either of them. EJ motions for her to back off. "Don't scold her, Elvis," says Stefano, "The little girl amuses me."

Sami wants to cut to the chase, "Who is Colleen, and is she the reason you have tried to destroy my family?"

Roman comes in and announces the coroner is stuck in traffic. Bo tells him Shawn is out there climbing the walls. "That's odd," says Roman, "He usually just drives right through them."

Bo tells Roman he is meeting Doug and Julie later to look for clues in the old tunnel. "Great," says Roman, "I've always hoped all of you would get a clue."

Roman asks if he needs backup. "No," says Bo, "Hope's coming with us. She's as good a cop as I am."

"And a hell of a lot prettier," says Roman.

"Not if I shave my beard," says Bo. The whole DiMera reunion thing gives Bo a bad feeling. Roman thinks too many DiMeras in one place is like being overrun by rats.

An officer delivers something from Willow's safe deposit box. Roman looks it over, "I think you'd better sit down, little brother."

Nick and Chelsea discuss their situation as the endless wait for the coroner continues. Nick doesn't see Roman really letting him off the hook. Nick tells Chelsea they've waited too long to be together, "When we're out of this whole mess, I want to spend the night with you."

"They call that a conjugal visit, don't they," asks Chelsea.

Shawn asks to talk to Belle alone.

Suddenly Stefano is tired. Sami tells EJ he was ready to run a marathon until she mentioned Colleen. "Colleen has been dead many years," says Stefano.

"I've heard you have that effect on people," says Sami. Stefano assures Sami Colleen has nothing to do with her family or his.

"Well, that just clears everything up," says Sami, "Thanks for that."

EJ tells her not to mock Stefano. Sami says she doesn't buy it. She wants the story of the feud, because it ends here and now. "If you want this feud over, consider it done," says Stefano, "But you're going to have to do more than show me respect. You have to sit and listen to exactly what I want in return." The Valkyries ride again.

Outside, Lucas yells for Sami. Tony comes up to him, "I don't think you should continue with that."

Roman reads the letter from Willow's safe deposit box, "If you've found this that means I am gone and the cops have put my life under a microscope. To set the record straight, I started the fire at the Brady place and set Chelsea up. I liked watching her squirm over that stupid hairbrush and Nick, too. I figured I'd blackmail him for all he's got. Looks like a girl like me wasn't meant to live happily ever after."

Bo observes there was no mention of Shawn. Roman tells him they have checked the letter out and it is real. Both Bo and Roman say they didn't need proof to believe Chelsea, but they feel better having it.

Bo doesn't think throwing the brush away was such a bright move, "So that explains why you did it, but if the coroner's report doesn't come back in Nick's favor, Willow just handed us Nick's motive for killing her."

Chelsea asks, "Nick, how can you even think of sex right now?"

"Not sex," says Nick, "Just being with you. I need to know I still have something good in my life. If not, then I'll settle for you." Chelsea decides she wants to do the deed, but wonders where they can go. Nick reminds her he still has Willow's apartment. Chelsea thinks the apartment's eeeuuuwwwwww factor is too high.

Phillip goes to check on the flight. Shawn tells Belle Phillip is doing this for himself. Shawn thinks if they find Claire in Chicago, Phillip will play the hero. He wants Claire to see her real father first. Belle tells him if that's what he wants, he has to get on the plane with them and hope they find her.

Lucas wants to know where Sami is. Tony tells him she is in with Stefano. Lucas orders him to open the door. Tony tells him just because he has lost his wife again is no reason to get nasty.

"You haven't seen nasty, pal," says Lucas, "Your butt will be finding a whoopee cushion when you least expect it."

Stefano tells Sami it's within her power to end the vendetta tonight. Sami thinks he is giving her the runaround. EJ tells her to listen to what Stefano has to say. "Are you shushing me," snorts Sami.

"Feisty, isn't she," laughs Stefano, "I see you have your hands full, my son." Sami denies she is a part of EJ's craziness. Stefano turns to Sami and gets ugly, "Your moral superiority is laughable. We DiMeras don't parade our sorrows in some beer-swilling pub for the world to see. We hold it close in our hearts. So I would consider the ones you love and how far you are prepared to keep from mourning them." Ramp up the Valkyries.

Shawn says he wants to get on that plane more than anything but he feels like a part of him died with Willow. Here's hoping it was the dumb part. Well, Belle just can't stay there. Shawn tells her to go and not let Phillip take over. Phillip comes back in and says everything is ready. He assures Shawn he will do everything he can to bring Claire, who is now a teenager, home.

Chelsea harangues on about why she can't bring herself to romp around in Willow's bed. Nick says, "I'm not sure there is an us anymore."

"What are you saying," asks Chelsea, "Put out or shut up?"

Nick says that's not what he means. He got the apartment for Willow but it was really all about Chelsea. If she buys that one, he deserves the congressional medal of honor. And... YEP! She buys it. She decides if he can go through all of that for her, she can face the apartment of death for him.

As the Valkyries mount to crescendo, Sami asks if Stefano is threatening her. Stefano says it was merely an observation. Coulda fooled Sami. She tells him she can't concentrate with the music blasting so the kinder and gentler Stefano turns it off.

EJ tries to refocus them. He tells Stefano Sami wants to settle their differences. Stefano tells Sami he will give her what she wants and she won't have to spend the rest of her life looking over her pretty little shoulder.

Tony assures Lucas Sami is fine. Lucas doesn't buy it as long as she is with Stefano, "If you hurt her, I guarantee I'm gonna kill you."

Tony asks, "What is it with everyone that wants to kill me." He snaps his fingers. Bart comes up and points a gun at Lucas. Tony continues, "You were saying?"

Nick tells Chelsea she should go and he will call when he hears something. Roman interrupts and says he's headed to get the coroner. The brat can wait in his office. Nick turns to Chelsea, "If this doesn't work out and this is it for us..."

She stops him, "Tonight will be it for us. When you're in there just think about me being in your arms."

"OK. I'll take my barf bag," says Nick. They express their undying love. Chelsea leaves as Nick stays to meet his fate.

Shawn walks in. He and Nick bond with the double over the forearm two snaps and a circle fist-butt. Damn, that was good. These guys are candidates for Cirque du Soleil. Nick knows the coroner, Dr. McGill, from a lecture series. The coroner is shocked to see him there. He never expected to see him under these circumstances. Nick tells him, "That makes two of us, sir."

Bo comes up to Shawn. Shawn asks if he is the baby's father.

Bart holds the gun in front of Lucas. Lucas recognizes it is a squirt gun, "So what are you going to do Bart," asks Lucas, "squirt me to death?"

Bart turns to Tony, "I told you he'd know the difference."

Tony shrugs, "One takes a chance."

Lucas nukes, "Let me in the damn warehouse!" At Tony's command, Bart lets him have it with both barrels... uh, nozzles... uh, he drenches him. Lucas cringes, "I'm meellltttiiinnnggg... I'm meellltttiiinnnggg..."

Sami thinks the baby is Lucas' child so things might not work out for Stefano. He tells her he is certain the child is EJ's, and gives her his offer, "You will marry my son and raise the child. And if you do, the DiMeras and Bradys will spend all the Days Of Our Lives in peace and harmony." Sami pukes.

The coroner goes over the technicalities of Willow's death, angle of fall, location of wounds, and all that. The coroner questions Nick's story that he gave Willow CPR, "Your shade of lipstick was not found on her body." The coroner says he has no other questions for Nick. His conclusions are on the report. Bo comes in and asks about the paternity of the baby. The coroner hands him the report and says he is sure Bo will want to tell his son himself. Bo leaves to take the results to Shawn.

"Come on, Roman," whines Nick, "Tell me what it says."

Chelsea comes back to Bo and Hope's house. Rap music (I realize that's an oxymoron, but we'll let it slip) plays in the background. She turns it off and calls for Bo. Jeremy comes out wrapped only in a towel and asks why she turned the music off. He dances around her like a dying sot and tells her to lighten up. Predictably, the towel drops. Sling 'em if ya got 'em. Chelsea turns green and backs away.

"What," asks Jeremy, "You don't like to dance?" Chelsea hurls like a fire hydrant.

Bart and Tony subdue Lucas. Tony asks, "What is it about the lowest creatures on the food chain? They are always the most difficult."

Sami refuses Stefano's offer. EJ claims he didn't know about this beforehand or they would have discussed it. Sami says she knows about EJ's discussions, which seem to involve things like guns and rape.

Stefano says his grandchild will be raised a DiMera or the vendetta will never end. The lights go out.

Chelsea tells Jeremy to pick up the towel. He tells her he likes to air-dry. She looks away, picks it up for him and announces she is out of there.

"What," he asks, "You don't like the view?"

"I prefer mountains to molehills."

She asks what he is doing there. Jeremy tells her he lives there. Hope said it was OK, "Welcome home, roomie!"

Roman reads the results. According to the coroner it was an accidental fall. Nick is free. Oh, the joy! "I hope you have plans to celebrate," says Roman.

"You have no idea," says Nick. He hugs Roman. A guy-hug, of course.

Phillip announces he got them on an earlier flight – a friend's plane. Belle likes having Phillip on her side, not because he has connections, but because he loves Claire, "I'm doubly blessed to have both you and Shawn." Belle breaks into song:

Double your pleasure
Double your fun
Get yourself two guys
Instead of just one.

"Let's go bring Claire home," says Phillip.

Shawn wallows in self-pity as he says he thinks he is responsible for Claire missing and now he might find out he ran out on another kid, "What part of being a man did I miss?"

"The adult part," says Bo, "Now open that thing up. Find out the truth, so you can get on with your life."

Shawn rips open the envelope, "Dang! Harvard has rejected me again."

Sami wonders why the lights went out. EJ says he has no idea. Sami accuses him of lying. We hear the sound of an engine. Sami looks around and wonders where Stefano went.

Slowly, the strange machine inches toward EJ and the damsel in distress.

Lucas is tied up on the floor. He struggles and stands up. He works at the doorknob with his hands tied behind him and screams, "SAMI!"

The Fatemobile creeps toward the cringing pair and stops. Professor Fate stands in the seat and looks at his compatriot, "PRESS THE BUTTON, MAX!"

Sami screams. FF.

Previews
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Chelsea says, "I really don't need to be taking advice from you." Jeremy says, "What you need is written all over your face." He kisses her.

Shawn says, "You did everything that you could." Nick says, "I'm not so sure I did."

Jeremy answers the door wrapped in another one of his many towels, "I'm coming, dude! Chill!" Jeremy opens the door and Patch stands there, "Who the hell are you?" It's Jeremy's jaw this time, not the towel, that hits the floor.

Lucas celebrates being married to Sami longer than he was married to Carrie. Carrie celebrates not being married to Lucas at all.