Danloe

Dear Prevuze Advisor:

I just started watching Days Of Our Lives and I'm still new to some of the terminology. I've caught on to some of the words like 'Safe,' 'Ejami,' 'Bricole' and such, but can you please explain the meaning of the term, 'Danloe?'

Thanks,
A DOOL Newbie

Dear Newbs:

Many followers or fans of Daniel and Chloe refer to the couple as 'Danloe.' Contrary to public opinion, however, this word is not a concatenation of the two names 'Daniel' and 'Chloe.' Rather, etymologically, it originated from 'down low,' referring to the fact that if you are acquainted with this pair you have friends in low places or, using the analogy of a barrel, you are very low inside it which is to say you are at the bottom of the barrel.

This may sound like a stretch, but let me elucidate by taking a look at Daniel and Chloe, individually and as a couple.

When the Dear Lord conceived Chloe, she thought they said 'brains' instead of 'boobs' and asked for a double helping. As a result she is the human equivalent of a Hoover SuperBag® which, as we all know, is a well-endowed vacuum.

She chased poor Brady to the ends of the earth attempting to hook up with him at all costs, only to refuse to marry him until facial scars from an auto accident healed. Well, the scars turned out to be as superficial as Chloe herself. She married Brady, who immediately turned to drugs to drown out the sound of her incessant whining.

With that relationship in the tank, she sucked village idiot Lucas out of a somewhat committed relationship and married him. After barely celebrating their nanosecond anniversary Dr. Daniel came along, poked her in the g-spot and she dropped Lucas like a hot potato. Along the way she became Phillip's loving and committed romp du jour.

Then, once she seemingly settled on Daniel and appeared finally to be making a go of a committed relationship, she had a bad hair day and jumped back in the sack with the now married Phillip.

Obviously the girl is as selective as the common housefly which, as we all know, will jump into a sack with any piece of meat.

Then there's Dr. Daniel Jonas, the cool, hip combo surfer, world-class surgeon who hit town as an old Kiriakis family friend.

Dr. Daniel immediately established himself as the town cradle robber as he dove in for a heapin-helpin' of the (presumed) underage Chelsea Brady.

That relationship falling apart, Daniel proved himself very versatile by going to the other end of the spectrum, zoning in on Chelsea's grandmother Kate and going a few rounds with her.

With the bedside manner of an octopus, Dr. Daniel could turn any woman's sore throat into a gynecological exam with the stroke of his hand.

And in the meantime, Daniel chased more skirts than a New York garment district worker in a windstorm, including a one night stand in his distant past, the product of which was a person some consider to be Satan's spawn.

And somehow through all this, Daniel and Chloe got together. Ya just gotta feel like they deserve each other.

But life is not easy at the bottom of the barrel and, as with most DOOL relationships trouble looms. Guilt-ridden Chloe wants to tell Daniel about her Phil-andering, but dim Dan won't let her get a word in edgewise and he keeps blaming himself for their problems.

Of course no one, probably not even the writers, knows how this relationship will turn out, but let's face it, 'Danloe' isn't exactly built on a foundation of bedrock. We'll all just have to keep looking in on this pair to see where their rompfest goes, but where ever you look, be sure it's in the place you're most likely to find them – down low.

Whatever it takes, though, make it a great weekend no matter where you have to look.

Sincerely,
The Prevuze Advisor

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