The Uber-Boondocks
Things just aren't going well here on the Prevuze compound. Our reception quality has moved from an exploding Jackson Pollock painting to a 1960's era paisley print gone bad and back to our old friend, "the death star," this morning. The good news is it's a really good looking death star.
I guess it's time to call (cue the jaws music please...)
NORRIS THE
SATELLITE GUY
The Prevuze compound isn't just located in the boondocks. We're in the next county over from the boondocks. We're the uber-boondocks. People in this area don't just jump on every new technology that comes along. We take things slow. So most of us are still on the old 1980's style big dishes and that means there is a big demand for Norris' services. Some of the people in the area are moving to those newfangled 1990's style small dishes. Mainly, those are the places to our south. They're close to the boondocks and that just goes to show you what happens when people get corrupted by civilization. They get... progressive. There's talk they might even build a Sonic down there. If that happens, it's time to start stocking up on bottled water and canned goods because the end is near.
I don't think that will happen, though, because everyone knows the world won't end until 2012 when the Mayan calendar bombs out. That's inevitable, and that's why we watch DOOL. Because the more DOOL you watch, the quicker you want the world to come to an end.So we'll get Norris out here to look at our system. You may continue to check back in while we wait for His Eminence to show up. Rest assured we'll continue to update you on our situation. Which is to say we'll whine about it like Chloe being drug past a shoe store.
I guess it's time to call (cue the jaws music please...)
SATELLITE GUY
The Prevuze compound isn't just located in the boondocks. We're in the next county over from the boondocks. We're the uber-boondocks. People in this area don't just jump on every new technology that comes along. We take things slow. So most of us are still on the old 1980's style big dishes and that means there is a big demand for Norris' services. Some of the people in the area are moving to those newfangled 1990's style small dishes. Mainly, those are the places to our south. They're close to the boondocks and that just goes to show you what happens when people get corrupted by civilization. They get... progressive. There's talk they might even build a Sonic down there. If that happens, it's time to start stocking up on bottled water and canned goods because the end is near.
I don't think that will happen, though, because everyone knows the world won't end until 2012 when the Mayan calendar bombs out. That's inevitable, and that's why we watch DOOL. Because the more DOOL you watch, the quicker you want the world to come to an end.So we'll get Norris out here to look at our system. You may continue to check back in while we wait for His Eminence to show up. Rest assured we'll continue to update you on our situation. Which is to say we'll whine about it like Chloe being drug past a shoe store.
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11 Comments:
A nice whine always makes things better. Along with the whine, try a little aged brie or smoke gouda - whine and cheese go well together.
I'm not sure if it's a good thing or a bad thing that you don't have a satellite geek squad just a phone call away. The presence of one of their garishly painted vehicles at the Prevuze compound would be like spray painting graffiti on its bucolic splendor. Oh well, that's my fantasy, and I'm sticking to it.
Norris is starting to make so many appearances in Prevuze he's going to start asking for royalties.
Maybe that's his plan. Then he can afford a snazzy new sports car to go along with his new Mercedes.
Loved the new pictures (eerie silence indeed) and appreciated the update. It was Uber-Funny.
Don't have another comment. Just wanted to be able to use the word verification if I posted.
It's "poopie". How fitting. lolol
Update: Norris, the all-knowing Swami of Satellite has been summoned to the Prevuze Compound. He and his entourage will arrive tomorrow afternoon.
First, a big THANK YOU! to Leslie for the lyrics yesterday. I'm making copies and will keep in the car so the next time they play Bennie (which is usually about once a day) I can finally follow along. Funny, isn't it tho - even now that I know the words it still doesn't make any sense at all! HA
Prevuze, let us know what Norris is driving this time - maybe he's upgraded to a Lamborghini. And I hate to sound so selfish at this difficult time but....if he isn't arriving until tomorrow afternoon does this mean we'll be without Prevuze tomorrow morning? If so I might have to obtain some of Squints' pills to get me thru. Of course it will be Friday so maybe I can cope.
LOL over folks appearing at the morgue right after a Brady lunch. Thanks for the pics and update and GOOD LUCK!
....if he isn't arriving until tomorrow afternoon does this mean we'll be without Prevuze tomorrow morning? If so I might have to obtain some of Squints' pills to get me thru.
Bulldog - The word is that you are going to have to arm wrestle Steponme for those pills. Being held captive by Owen must be almost as tramatic as not being able to read Prevuze's description of the "action" on DOOL.
Ease up on Owen. So he's a little possessive, a little obsessive, a little loco and emits strong vapors of the heebidajeebies, He's not bad on the eyes and with that body, he can duct tape my mouth and carry me anywhere he wants. You have to admit, he is as freaky as Nick on RedBull and painkillers, but he looks a whole lot better. MMM MM MMMM. When will we see a shirtless scene of Owen,the bumbling chipendale dancer?
When everything is back on track I wonder what new, and exciting things will be happening!
~Speaking of Nick, does anyone know when he's supposed to be released from 'prison'? 'Cause no one seems to mention that anymore... they don't even seem to go visit. lol
Also, Nick is superior to Owen in all possible ways.
BULLETIN: Norris came early! He tried a quick fix. If it worked, we get a show tomorrow. If not, we lay a new cable. A PLAN! I LOVE IT!
BULLETIN: Norris came early! He tried a quick fix. If it worked, we get a show tomorrow. If not, we lay a new cable. A PLAN! I LOVE IT!
OMG, bless Norris and the Ferrari he rode in on!
Hip Hip Hooray!
However I'll try not to get my hopes up. It can be a long drop from the heights of anticipating a Prevuze recap to the trough of depression when the forest of Mordor thwart a satellite feed.
Here's hoping Norris knows his stuff.
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