Salem's Biggest Idiot

ERIN GO BLECCHH! It's St. Patrick's Day at the Brady Pub. Toasts! Merriment! Caroline discovers Belle there drinking alone. Caroline says, "Belle, this isn't like you. You usually prefer to have people around to unload on when you're crying in your beer. You're the matron of honor tomorrow. You should be back helping plan the wedding. Is this some kind of final goodbye to Shawn?"

"No. I don't know how yet, but I'm definitely stopping the wedding," vows the sot.

Shawn runs into Bo and wonders what he's doing there alone. He's celebrating Shawn's wedding tomorrow, "Of course Hope won't be there but I'm glad you invited me. But I know everyone will be offering condolences about Zack and wondering where your mom is."

"Dad," says Shawn, "If you want to sit out here and feel sorry for yourself, that's fine but the only one who is keeping Mom away right now is you, and you are the only one who can bring her back."

Sami is with Carrie. She wakes up. Sami asks if she misses her appendix. Carrie asks where Austin is. "He and Lucas are at the gift shop," says Sami.

Carrie says, "Sami, you look like something's wrong. What is it?"

"I probably shouldn't tell you while you are recovering, but it's Mom. She was in an explosion and a fire. They don't know if she will make it. I can't let her die."

"Well," says Carrie, "If she does, she always seems to come back to life sooner or later."

Lexie tells John and Alex Marlena isn't regaining consciousness as quickly as they would like. John wants to know what that means.

Alex says, "It means she's unconscious, John. As a psychiatrist, I can tell you she's been through a lot, amnesia and every other trauma known to man, plus having us two clods as husbands. But what Dr. Carver is telling us is Marlena's injuries are not life-threatening."

"Correct," says Lexie, "She's suffering from shock, smoke inhalation and a few first-degree burns. I just had to come out here and make the announcement like she was on the verge of dying to have a good cliffhanger to leave for yesterday's episode."

"Good," says Alex, "I want to see her."

"No way," says growls John, "You lousy bastard, you set that explosion that almost killed her!"

Bo says he has done everything he can to get Hope to come home. Shawn tells him he could assure her he isn't taking the brat's side in the trial. Bo claims Hope always comes first with him. They are a family and they have to figure out a way to make this work.

"Without Zack and Mom, it doesn't feel like a family," says Shawn, "And I don't want Chelsea to be a part of our family."

"But Chelsea is my daughter," says Bo.

"Right," says Shawn, "You know, I never knew there were so many different kinds of love. I've loved Belle for a long time, but things change. And I feel the same way about Mimi. I do love her..."

"Shawn," says Bo, "Have you changed your mind about marrying Mimi because you're still in love with Belle?" Shawn stares.

Caroline wants to know just how Belle is planning to stop the wedding. "I don't know," slurs Belle, "My motorcycle is in the shop, but I'm not gonna let him go commit his life to some other woman."

"What about your husband," says Caroline.

"Stop nit-picking," says Belle, "I love him but it's not the same."

"You took sacred vows before God," says Caroline.

"God has to learn to be flexible," says Belle.

"You would be destroying Phillip's happiness, Shawn and Mimi's, even Claire's. How can you do that."

"It is, after all, all about me," says Belle, "And I love Shawn too much."

Victor overhears and thinks, "She's feeling that bond with Shawn because Claire is his baby."

Alex claims he had no idea John, Abe or Marlena were going to show up at the cabin tonight. He says he was the target. Abe agrees, "Lois probably set the explosive device. We'll know more after the arson squad completes its investigation because, unlike the Salem PD, the arson squad hires competent people.

Alex insists on seeing Marlena. John says there is no way that will happen. Lexie steps in and says, "Marlena is my patient. I'm not going to let either of you see her because that would just upset her. Besides, Tek and I are using the room next to hers."

Abe and John decide to go up to the cabin and look for additional clues. John tells Alex he has to come with them since he is the prime suspect. Alex asks if he is under arrest. "No," says Abe, "But I could find a way to make you come along. Ve have vayz of makink you cooperate."

"Fine," says Alex, "The sooner I'm cleared, the sooner I can get back to Marlena."

"The sooner she gets her past back, the sooner you're out of her life," sneers John.

"She'll never remember you," says Alex. Larry, Moe and Curly head off to the cabin.

Meanwhile, the fair Marlena lies unconscious and has flashes of John.

Sami frets about her mom. Lexie yanks back the drape and tells them Marlena will be OK. Lexie wants to talk to Carrie in private. Sami goes to sit with Marlena. Lexie tells Carrie they were able to use laparoscopic surgery to remove the appendix, so she will be up and around quickly, "But there is something we discovered... because of your surgery." Dumb-da-dumb-dumb.

Shawn tells Bo he is committed to Mimi, "But Belle keeps telling me she's still in love with me, and I wouldn't say this to anyone but you – I still feel torn between Mimi and Belle."

"I understand, son."

"Because you had to choose between Mom and Billie," says Shawn.

Caroline tells Belle if she leaves Phillip for another man, he will fight for custody of Claire. Belle has that one covered, "Because Phillip would want the best for Claire and that's ME."

Belle guzzles more green beer as Caroline tells her Phillip will be hurt if she leaves him and that could cause him to do things he might not ordinarily do. She thinks Phillip would fight for Claire. Belle asks, "Victor never went after Bo, did he?"

"No," says Caroline, "He didn't know Bo was his son until he was grown up."

"And you knew all along," says Belle, "So, did you stay married to OMB because of the other children or because you truly loved him more?"

Lexie reminds Carrie she had an ovarian cyst rupture when she was in Israel, "There is some residual scarring which could affect your chances of conceiving."

"Are you telling me I could be infertile," asks Carrie.

"We can never be certain on DOOL," says Lexie, "We have to leave those options open for the writers. Hell, Mimi herself is supposed to be totally infertile and I figure she could pop a kid any time.

John and Abe search the rubble as Alex watches. One of the firemen comes up to Abe and says, "Commander Carver, I think we have found the cause of the fire." John grits his teeth like they are glued together.

Sami tells Marlena she wants her in her life, "You want to hear something pathetic? Right now I don't have one single human on the planet I can talk to. The truth is... I still love Lucas. But I think I could be happy with Austin... except he and Lucas are still hung up on Carrie. And I know every time I am given a choice, I make the wrong one. I need you, Mom. Please come back to me." Sami leaves. Marlena has more flashes of memory. She calls John's name.

Bo says, "I never had to choose between your mom and Billie because I thought Hope was dead. I don't know how I could have been so stupid to think she wouldn't come back to life, but I got involved with Billie. When she came back, I didn't know it was her, but as soon as I found out it was your mom, there was no question who I wanted to be with. But as far as Belle is concerned, if you have those kind of feelings for her, you have some serious thinking to do before you get married to Mimi tomorrow."

"Thinking isn't my strong suit," says Shawn.

Caroline tells Belle divorce was never an option for her. The affair with Victor never should have happened.

"How can you say that," asks Belle, "You wouldn't have had Bo, and we wouldn't have had Shawn or Zack."

"Easy-come-easy-go," says Caroline, "But you and Shawn don't share a child, so it's not the same situation as me and Victor."

Belle gulps more green beer and says, "I wish Claire were Shawn's child. Everything would be a whole lot easier, wouldn't it?" Victor contemplates.

Lexie tells Carrie the scarring could make it more difficult to conceive, "And the longer you wait..."

"I know," says Carrie, "I've been thinking about it a lot. I want to be a mom and teach my kids about values and ideas."

Sami eavesdrops, "So, you've got it all planned out. You just have to decide who your kids' father is going to be – Austin or Lucas."

Marlena remembers romping with John.

The fireman tells John and Abe the fire was caused by a faulty water heater. There was a wrench next to the water heater that could have been used to do something to it, but there is no evidence of arson.

John tells Alex, "I'm gonna find a way to prove you killed Lois and burned down her cabin. And if the cops don't bust you for that, I'm gonna find a way to take you out." Alex smirks.

"You can't spend your life wishing," says Caroline, "Shawn isn't Claire's father, so you have to start thinking about the possibilities.

"Thinking isn't my strong suit," says Belle.

"If you love him, you'll let him go," says Caroline. Behind her, Victor gets up and goes to the bar.

Caroline gets up and goes over to the bar. She tells victor, "Belle is having a terrible time getting over Shawn. I told her she had to give him up."

"The way you did with me," says Victor.

Meanwhile, Bo asks Shawn, "If Belle wasn't married, would Mimi be the woman you chose to marry and spend the rest of your life with?"

Sami listens as Lexie tells Carrie she knows how she feels, "There are no guarantees how things will turn out – Just look at your sister Sami. You were raised in the same house, same parents..."

"Step parents," says Carrie, "It's kind of crazy."

"Yes," says Lexie, "And I'm sure Sami will use that as an excuse for the rest of her life. But, look at you, you turned out great. Your children will be very fortunate to have you as a mother... Just don't wait too long to try."

"I have to find a husband first."

"You have two men in your life who are crazy about you – Austin and Lucas. Choose one."

"I wish it were that easy," says Carrie.

Lexie says, "Don't tell me you're still worried about Sami.

"I told her I was over Austin."

"You're not responsible for Sami's happiness," says Lexie, "Do you really think she gives a damn about you?" Sami boils.

Marlena remembers giving John a watch, "It's a way of thanking you for giving me back my life. I'll never forget what you did." She remembers him giving her a bracelet with good luck charms for her second chance at life. Only her second chance. These are some old, old memories. Another memory. Marlena says, "He is mine and I am his for all the Days Of Our Lives." Marlena calls his name again.

"You just threatened me in front of an officer of the law," says Alex, "Keep it up and you'll wind up in jail where you belong. You just can't accept the fact that Marlena is in love with and wants to stay with me. So if you don't mind I'd like to get back to my wife."

Alex leaves. John throws a tantrum. Alex tries to calm him down, "John, I am your friend, there is nothing here to implicate Alex. Think about the situation."

"Thinking isn't my strong suit," says John.

"The only person who can save Marlena from being a part of Alex' life is Marlena herself," says Abe.

"Then she's just going to have to get her memory back," says John.

"Alex has her under his spell," says Abe, "There is still the possibility she could choose to be with him."

"Like I said before," says John, "I'll kill him before that happens."

Bo asks, "All things being equal, who would you marry? Belle or Mimi?"

"I think you already know," says Shawn, "But all things aren't equal and so I am marrying Mimi. And we will have a wonderful life together. And Belle will accept that and finally commit to her wonderful life with Phillip and Claire."

Victor asks Caroline if she had it to do over again, would she still keep the truth from him about Bo being his son and stay married to Shawn. Caroline tells him yes.

Delightful Heather comes up to Belle and says Shawn is going to marry her best friend tomorrow. She pours more green beer to remind Belle of the envy which is boiling up inside her, "Don't tell me you drank this whole pitcher yourself – drowning your sorrows are you? I propose a toast to you. Salem's biggest idiot, the girl who let Shawn Brady get away."

Heather gets up and leaves. Belle says, "Thanks, Heather. Caroline, I'm gonna do the right thing. One way or another, I'm gonna stop that wedding." FF on a shot of Belle and Shawn.


Previews
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John stands over Marlena's bed as she says, "I remember us." Flash to Alex.

Mimi beams. Belle hugs John, "I know I have myself to blame. I just don't know how I can stand by and watch him marry Mimi."

Carrie says, "There is something I need to talk to both of you about." Austin says, "Good, because Lucas and I need to talk to you, too."

Lexie says, "Sami, what the hell do you think you're doing?" Sami says, "It's about time we had a little chat, Lexie."