Monday, April 29, 2013

Caveman

Stefano played Sami like a fiddle. #DAYS
 
Nick: "I'll see that things work out with Will." Gabi: "You really mean that?" Nick: "Absolutely." Translation: Absolutely not. #DAYS
 
Kristin likes watching Brady act like a caveman.  He pulls it off so well because he thinks like a caveman. Apologies to all cavemen. #DAYS
 
Brady has to take the call outside half-dressed. Just how long would it take to button his shirt? #DAYS

Thursday, April 25, 2013

Breakfast With A Side Of Crazy

What? No strippers today? Not even a flashback? The DOOL writers giveth and the DOOL writers taketh away. #DAYS
 
Daniel wants to be a professional stripper. Motivated, it seems, by all those women's hands down his pants at the strip club. #DAYS
 
Jen wants to go to the hospital alone. Dan reminds her there is no "I" in team. But there's an "I" in idiot, so off she goes. #DAYS
 
Vargas says he doesn't want his breakfast with a side of crazy.  If it's with Nicole, crazy is the main course. #DAYS

Wednesday, April 24, 2013

No Socially Redeeming Value

The scenes of dancing at the strip club: the phrase "no socially redeeming value" comes to mind.  What's that called, again? #DAYS
 
Guy viewers: Stand up for your rights! Demand equal time with scenes of the gals stripping. Down with the double standard!  #DAYS
 
Depending on your point of view, this show was either a new low or a new high for #DAYS
 
Be glad the encore when Victor and Stefano came on stage was cut out of the show. #DAYS
 
Given the show, I'd say the guys learned to dance by hanging worms on fishhooks and watching them wiggle. #DAYS

Too Horny To Care

 

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

The Sugar Plum Busybody

Daniel introduces Jennifer, but doesn't introduce the babysitter.  He's such a guy. (For the record, her name is Joanna). #DAYS
 
Maxine gossips with Abby.  You, know... the same Maxine who reamed her nurses out for gossiping a few days ago. #DAYS
 
Surely when Eric was in the hall and heard Nicole screaming "Oh-God-Oh-God-Oh-God" he didn't expect to find her praying. #DAYS
 
What do you get when you cross Jennifer and Maggie? The Sugar Plum Busybody. #DAYS

Monday, April 22, 2013

The Day They Lost Bullwinkle

Hope tells Ciara her daddy is coming home. Ciara wonders if Miss Carly is coming back with him. #DAYS
 
The unspeakable tragedy Maggie isn't talking about from that day long ago with Team Moose: That's the day they lost Bullwinkle. #DAYS
 
Abe confronts Cameron and wants to know what's going on. Cameron's situation is more about what's coming off. #DAYS
 
Kristin goes dumpster diving.  Somehow it seems like an appropriate metaphor for her life. #DAYS

Thursday, April 18, 2013

Running His Rainbow Flag Up The Flagpole

Caroline recognizes Cameron/Apollo. Free drinks at the pub for him from now on. #DAYS
 
Protip for Kristin: Never blurt out that you can explain everything until you know for sure there's something you have to explain. #DAYS
 
John, when Hope says "we need to talk," it really means, "you need to run." #DAYS
 
Narrow minded Tad is certainly running his rainbow flag up the flagpole these days, isn't he? #DAYS
 
Brian: "I've gotta jet." Translation: "I've gotta make like a bread truck and haul buns." #DAYS

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Over Niagara Falls In A Barrel

EJ pops the question and Sami looks like he asked her to go over Niagara Falls in a barrel. #DAYS
 
Lucas says he doesn't want to blow his own horn.  In his case it would be blowing his own kazoo. #DAYS
 
That was the longest proposal since they presented the original Geneva Accords. #DAYS
 
Lucas figures Sami and EJ had was a private lunch because of the 'closed' sign, "I'm quick like that." Actually, Lucas, you're not. #DAYS
 
Gabi: "You're scaring me." Nick: "Something I said?" Gabi: "No, I looked at you." #DAYS

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

That DiMera Bitch Is Going Down

Sy: "That DiMera bitch is going down." Based on my observations, she does — frequently. #DAYS
 
Is the color on my TV weird or since Chloe walked in on Daniel and Jennifer, did she cake on a few more pounds of makeup? #DAYS
 
Sami suspects Nicole is interested in Vargas. Wherever would she get an idea like that?" #DAYS

Monday, April 15, 2013

After You Get What You Want You Don't Want What You Get

Sy, don't worry about an APB.  In Salem that stands for "All Police Bungle-it." #DAYS
 
Rafe calls Kate: "We need to hash this out." Translation — booty call. #DAYS
 
Sami: "You're not leaving until we talk." Sami, there is no longer a ring  on your finger or through Rafe's nose. #DAYS
 
Nicole says she thought she and Chloe were best friends. After all, Nicole used her best strain of flesh eating bacteria on her. #DAYS
 
Looks like Kate and Rafe have reached the "after you get what you want you don't want what you get" stage of their relationship. #DAYS

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Losing It — Abby's Plan

 

Friday, April 12, 2013

At The Nudie Bar

Separated at birth... Cameron and Elaine from Seinfeld. I'm guessing we'll never see either on Dancing With The Stars. #DAYS
 
Sami: "I'm choking on how nice I will be." I'm choking on lunch watching this. #DAYS
 
Caroline! At the nudie bar! Maybe it's therapy to get her to remember a few things she's forgotten. #DAYS
 
Daniel tells Chloe if they were together they'd be living a lie.  In Salem, that's also known as business as usual. #DAYS

Thursday, April 11, 2013

A Private Showing

Jennifer: "I have to call Daniel... I can't... I can't..." Her brain is a shorted out pinball machine. #DAYS
 
Amazing... Abby hasn't seen Stefano in a while but had a two second conversation with him without blurting out she's a virgin. #DAYS
 
Stefano: "Spring is here." Yeah, Salem must be one of the places that DIDN'T get a foot of snow yesterday. #DAYS
 
Abby swears she's not going to go see Cameron's show. Maybe she's hoping for a private showing. #DAYS

Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Eat Poop And Die

Sonny says he didn't come to the DiMera mansion to see Sami; he came to see EJ.  Eye candy, I guess. #DAYS
 
Nicole: "Have a nice life, Chloe." Translation: eat poop and die. #DAYS
 
Will says he'd never delve into Sami's personal life.  Her and EJ's couch calisthenics excluded. #DAYS
 
And the conversation between Jen and Laura continues... after Jen says she doesn't want to talk about it. #DAYS
 
Rafe says he'll never talk to Kate again. I'm guessing he's still open for other things, though. #DAYS

Monday, April 08, 2013

Evidence Is So Overrated

If Lucas has a clue it must be one someone threw in the trash because it didn't work anymore. #DAYS
 
Nicole says Vargas wants to put the past in the past. As opposed to what, the hall closet? #DAYS
 
Lucas says he's not telling Jennifer, "I told you so." Right before he tells her, "I told you so." #DAYS
 
Parker keeps poking his iPad and talking about cows. He must be playing Angry Herds. #DAYS
 
Hope thinks this guy's the perp because he got nervous? Yeah, evidence is so overrated. #DAYS

Thursday, April 04, 2013

A Red Letter V On Her Blouse

Daniel gives Jennifer a sloppy kiss right before going into surgery. I hope the hospital has Purell for Cooties. #DAYS
 
Vargas introduces himself to EJ: "I'm Vargas... That's French for 'wolf in sheep's clothing.'" #DAYS
 
Daniel to Jennifer: "I need you, you need me." Now I can't get the Barney song out of my head. #DAYS
 
Jen's solution: Tell Daniel. Dan plays along, gets close to Chloe. Chloe brings Parker back. Dan dumps her. Too complex for Jen, tho. #DAYS
 
It's all over town now, so The Virgin Abby has to wear a red letter "V" on her blouse from now on. #DAYS

Wednesday, April 03, 2013

All Of North Korea's Rockets

Kate asks if Sonny and Will are OK. Translation: "May I butt in?" #DAYS
 
Maxine: "Working at more than one hospital at a time is against state law." Does that joint count as a hospital? #DAYS
 
BULLETIN: Kim Jong Un has announced if there is one more scene with Jennifer, he will point all of North Korea's rockets at Salem. #DAYS
 
Will says he won't say anything about Kate and Rafe. Like he didn't say anything about his mom and EJ? #DAYS

Tuesday, April 02, 2013

Raising Your Kids In The House Of Usher

Will wonders what's wrong with Nick. Other than being a wackadoodle? #DAYS
 
John: "I don't approve of you raising your kids in The House of Usher." Wouldn't that be a step up from the DiMera mansion? #DAYS
 
Kate: "I can see the wheels turning in your brain." The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead. #DAYS
 
Sami, John, Brady and Marlena all together in the pub. In scientific circles, this is known as critical mass. #DAYS

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